I cannot sleep. Drowsy allergy medicine, NyQuil, I took way more than a patience needs, however, I am not sick, but still they don't help me to sleep.
My mind has too much, but my heart is empty and lonely. It seems like nothing can take away the things from my mind, nothing can fill my heart up.
I cried again. I wish my tear drops can take my things out of my mind. I wish my tear can build the connection to bring the things going into my heart.
I just sat in the park for two hours holding a hot cocoa. It got cold gradually. I thought of my Heavenly Father. I missed him. I wanted to go back to him. Because He is the only will always love me.
I asked him if I chose to end my life at that moment, could I still come back to him?
He did not answer me.
Crying was gone. I was exhausted. I got tired. I went home. I hoped I could sleep.
Where was my pillow? Where was my blanket? Where was my buddy?
I guess I could not find them.
My mind has too much, but my heart is empty and lonely. It seems like nothing can take away the things from my mind, nothing can fill my heart up.
I cried again. I wish my tear drops can take my things out of my mind. I wish my tear can build the connection to bring the things going into my heart.
I just sat in the park for two hours holding a hot cocoa. It got cold gradually. I thought of my Heavenly Father. I missed him. I wanted to go back to him. Because He is the only will always love me.
I asked him if I chose to end my life at that moment, could I still come back to him?
He did not answer me.
Crying was gone. I was exhausted. I got tired. I went home. I hoped I could sleep.
Where was my pillow? Where was my blanket? Where was my buddy?
I guess I could not find them.
1 comment:
Denis, we miss you and hope you are doing okay. What is new in your life? The boys always ask how you are doing and say hi! We would love to hear from you.
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